Married Men Vs Happy Men
Married Men vs Happy Men
Usually, scenarios in life may have a linear understanding to them. You losing the boxing match is you losing the damned match. There’s nothing more to it then a bleeding nose and some broken ribs.
You dropping a bottle of beer implies bloodshed in the beverage fraternity and a night full of guilt, but you see, it still remains to tread a linear path of understanding.
However, there could be scenarios, quite a few of them that may have a dual understanding associated to them.
We see you heading out for some more beer because this seems to massively mess with your head, but allow us to state an example.
You a married man? Ever realised that the moment you said your “I do’s” was the beginning and the end of something. Something being, yeah we heard it, your happiness!
Now, quite a lot of feminists may disagree with what is being said here. But ladies, you need to hold a beer and cop a squat. We mean no offence, or maybe we do. But this is just because you did not let poor Ol’ Steve to go out with his Buddies for Bowling nights. Now Steve is depressed! Look what you’ve done to the chipper of a fella!
So while this debate (well, not many to argue though) has lasted for ages, we show you — making you reminisce those — things that changed forever once you willingly walked down to your debacle.
- No more Game nights
No more friends coming over and hulking around the house in purple knickers. No more beer pong sessions at home, no more pizza decorating the floor and no more fragrances making the house so liveable. Once you tie the knot, all of this “freedom” is lost.
- You may (will) have to ditch bowling nights and sorts
All those dogfights you got into because some thick-head insulted your favourite club stops when you have to show a sound face at home, post 9, every night. You can’t stay out for long because duh! You have taken up a responsibility, haven’t you? Plus, your lil angel waits up till you’re home and that’s some guilt you want to evade for real.
- Entertain relatives you don’t relate to
Now that you have signed up to stand by her, in sickness and in pain, you automatically have signed up to tolerate her sickeningly know-it-all brother who would leave no chance to put you down. But what can you do? Just smile and wave, boys! Smile and wave.
- Got to give your kiddiewinks a horsey ride
You remember those days when your lift at work broke down and you had to scale 15 floors to get to your cabin and another 7 floors to get to your canteen and then 7 floors back down to get back to your cabin? And then your back it gives up on you like you don’t own it anymore and your wife made you do the dishes because it’s your turn? Yes, that is the perfect day your kids want to horsey you around the house. Should’ve just said, “I can’t.”
- Less beer, more fruit-shake
All your life you have been lionised for being the ultimate “chugger” of your clan and there were about to conduct experiments on your “swallowing abilities” but now? Now you have to lead a healthy life and stay in shape because Amy would be so embarrassed to show Santa as her dad at the Annual Parent-Teacher meet and you HAVE TO LOVE amy! Oh, btw, Larry (who decided not to marry) sends you a postcard from LA with 3 playboy bunnies alongside.
So while there is still time to run, hope you don’t stay around trying to find your shoelaces. Also, we gon’ be at the Pub down the corner, in case you wanna find us.